Things to do at Wal-Mart while...

evilmonkeyMSP

Scrotie McBoogerBalls
Contributor
:
'13 CWP MS3 & '16 Mazda6 GT
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
peoples' carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off
at 5-minute intervals<O:p</O:p


3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading
to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an
official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's
on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted
area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell
other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows
from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to
cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' <O:p></O:p>


9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a
mirror, & and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department,
ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming
the Mission Impossible theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna
look using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse
through, say PICK ME!

14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker,
assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices
again!!!!

And; last, but not least!)

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait
a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in
here!"<O:p</O:p
<O:p</O:p
 
OOOOOOOOOOR ..... you could get a life and not hang out in retail stores
 
we got a great saturday planned. gonna go to home depot and maybe bed bath and beyond, dunno if there is enough time. (rofl)
 
olo "Frank the tank!!!"



Moeed said:
we got a great saturday planned. gonna go to home depot and maybe bed bath and beyond, dunno if there is enough time. (rofl)
 
also oldschool:

30 things to do while driving..
# Vary your vehicle's speed inversely with the speed limit.
# Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to headbang.
# At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors.
# Two words: Chicken suit.
# Write the words "Help me" on your back window in red paint. The more it looks like blood, the better.
# Have conversation, looking periodically at the passenger seat, when driving alone.
# Laugh a lot. A whole lot.
# Stop at the green lights.
# Go on the red ones.
# Occasionally wave a stuffed animal/troll doll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to make it dance.
# Eat food that requires silverware.
# Pass cars, then drive very slowly.
# Sing without having the radio on.
# Honk frequently without motivation.
# Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer an angry look and an obscene gesture.
# Ask people for Grey Poupon.
# Let pedestrians know who's boss.
# Look behind you frequently, with a very paranoid look.
# Restart your car at every stop light.
# Hang numerous car-fresheners on the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly.
# Lob burning things in the windows of smokers who throw their butts out the window.
# While stopped at a light, piss out the window/sunroof onto other cars.
# Paint your car with occult symbols.
# Keep at least five cats in the car.
# Have some passengers in the back who are having wild, noisy sex.
# Root (cheer, not snuffle in the mud) for fire trucks.
# Stop and collect roadkill.
# Stop and pray to roadkill.
# Throw Spam.
# Get in the fast lane and gradually...slow...down..to a stop. Then get out and watch the cars. Throw Spam at them.
 
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