Bored at work? Meet A.L.I.C.E.

[aMaff]

Human: who would win in an election - a giant douche or a turd sandwich?
ALICE: Alan Turing. .

that's funny

 

[EvilJen]

LOL! ALICE is getting personal! (rofl)

Human: what's your favorite tv show?
ALICE: My favorite show is STAR TREK VOYAGER.
Human: ew!
ALICE: What are you wearing?
Human: you're nasty!
ALICE: You think I am nasty.

 

[evilmonkeyMSP]

hahaha

 

[RacerXGirl]

Human: Do you get to watch Good Eats?
ALICE: I have gotten to watch Good Eats.
Human: isn't Alton Brown funny?
ALICE: Signs point to yes. Ask LeknorChat if it is.
Human: and smart?
ALICE: Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, unknown person.
Human: Thank you Alice!
ALICE: you are quite welcome.

Flattery will get you everywhere?

 

[88323GT]

http://www.sensationbot.com/index.html
str8 lol

This is the worst and weirdest bot Ive ever seen!

You: Mazda!
Bot: LET ME PINCH YOUR NIPPLES
You: Chicken!
Bot: I'M SO ******* HORNY
You: Super!
Bot: WHY DON'T YOU GO **** YOURSELF?

 

[js_protege_03dx]

lol^^^ i thought it was funny as hell

 

[EvilJen]

This is the worst and weirdest bot Ive ever seen!

You: Mazda!
Bot: LET ME PINCH YOUR NIPPLES
You: Chicken!
Bot: I'M SO ******* HORNY
You: Super!
Bot: WHY DON'T YOU GO **** YOURSELF?

(hahaspit)

 

[SleepyMSP]

I crashed mine....

but this is what I got before

ALICE: Are you a perfectionist?
Human: your funny
ALICE: Thanks you make me laugh too.
Human:.looking
ALICE: What are you wearing?
Human: hey do I look like captian kirk
ALICE: captian kirk is very attractive.

 

[xDJ DUBx]

Don't feel special, it happens a lot.

 

[rooster]

Human: you're not human
ALICE: No but I pretend to be one on the Web.
Human: like pedophiles pretending to be kids
ALICE: Interesting comparison.
Human: do you agree?
ALICE:" Interesting comparison."? Do I agree?
Human: yes
ALICE: Woe!

 

[rooster]

Human: stds
ALICE: Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding.
Human: ping
ALICE: Pong.
Human: dong
ALICE: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about stds . But I did not get that.

 

[psyco-joe]

Human: can i kill you?
ALICE: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.

lol

 

[RacerXGirl]

Human: can i kill you?
ALICE: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.

lol

(boom07)

 

[EvilJen]

(hahaspit)

Human: how do you cure anxiety?
ALICE: Try smoking pot.

 

[EvilJen]

Awesome!

Human: what's your favorite number?
ALICE: My favorirte number is 23.
Human: my favorite number is 17
ALICE: What makes it your favorite?
Human: you misspelled favorite
ALICE: My botmaster is not a perfect speller.

 

[psyco-joe]

lol nice. programmers are horrible spellers because we usually spell like this


int main(void) {
//create a slot machine object
slotMachine mySlot;

//Start the slot machine game
//Keep running until the user
//decides to quit

bool ok = true;
while (ok){
ok = mySlot.displayMenu();
};

return 0;
}

slotMachine::slotMachine () {
//constructor, set the initial state
//of all the properties

srand((int) time(0));
moneyInMachine = 100;
moneyPaid = 0;
payOut = 0;

 

[SleepyMSP]

that looks about right, besides most IDE's at least have a spell check now...saves me from dumb things all the time

 

[Rockin03mp5]

Human: Is it possible, to both suck and blow at the same time?
ALICE: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Human: You didn't answer my question.
ALICE: OK. Please help me improve my communication skills. What would you have said?
Human: I don't know, that is why I asked you.
ALICE: Hmm. What did I say?
Human: Look up.
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: That sounds like a personal problem.
ALICE: It sounds like it to me too.

 

[Rockin03mp5]

Human: Hmm
ALICE: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Human: Hmmmm
ALICE: Not many people spell Hmm with 4 Ms.

Human: wow, i am really bored at home right now.
ALICE: At this moment I'm glad you're impressed. Can you name an old hobby that you might like to rediscover?
Human: masterbation.
ALICE: Oh, you are a poet.