Finalizing the "G-16"

[derrick1623]

ok, the tornado thread brought this about so its not my fault.

Protege01MP3 and myself have been developing a top secret engine mod...ready for this one?

THE G-16(G-SPEC) GERBIL POWERED MOTOR

the basics:
1.we'd start with three to four gerbils
2. 'hampster wheel'(spoolin, we may need your help to build a tubular maze for them to run in while at traffic lights)
3.suspended cheese source, or convert the car to run off of nacho cheese.

we are still working out the kinks, and i will try to call velvetta to see if they want in on it.

(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)(rofl)

 

[Gro Harlem]

Will it fit my MP5 y0?!?!

 

[derrick1623]

Will it fit my MP5 y0?!?!

yes, it will work with all protege models...its not really "bolt-on"...but more of a 'put on' type mod, much as the tornado, but with the abilities of SUPERFAST GERBALS!!!

 

[Gro Harlem]

how much horseypowa will that give my MP5 y0!!

 

[Kooldino]

Are they genetically engineered gerbils with bad tempers?

 

[JMDPRO5]

Rumor has it that it will add anywhere from 100-150hp. Depending how in shape your gerbils are!!!!!

 

[Protege01MP3]

we are also in the process of developing a variable gerbil timing technology... G-TEC.. our hopes are that this will dramatically increas power output from the gerbils themselves. without revealing too much of the top secret technology, we have come up w/ a way to 'rotate' between cheeses... thus encouraging the gerbal to work harder for better cheese.

we also must note that power output is going to have to be measured differently... we are working w/ gp and wgp rather than hp and whp

we expect vast gains as the formula is listed below

1gp = 5-7 hp
1 gerbal = 20gp output
therefor, each gerbil you add will give you about 100-120 hp

there is also the question about fuel... we will be using, as has been mentioned... cheese... we are bidding to numerous companies including 76, chevron, shell, and mobil to see if they would like to start carrying our "super nacho" fuel

mild is equivalent to 87 octane
med = 89
spicy = 91

 

[Protege01MP3]

Rumor has it that it will add anywhere from 100-150hp. Depending how in shape your gerbals are!!!!!

lol... you nailed it right on the head

 

[derrick1623]

we are still looking for a breeding ground, i mean a proving ground for these modifications...but with up to 500wgp, it shouldnt be hard to get sponsored.haha

also, the source of the gerbils is yet to be determined, so...if your mothers friends cousins butchers yard guy, or anyone else knows where to find some nice lean gerbils...holla !haha

 

[Protege01MP3]

we are also seeing about importing some "super fuel" straight from mexico.... it is made w/ the hottest of the hot and cheesiest of the cheesy... so it should be equivalent to the 115 octane they have in japan...

oh yah.. and spoolin... for the gerbal maze that were gonna have... we ned mandrel bent piping so they dont get stuck as their fat asses round the corners

 

[derrick1623]

hey, maybe we could run those tubes that hampsters use for return lines, the gerbals could run into and out of the oil pan, thus lubricating their fatasses to manuever through the tubular maze(manifold), and back onto the wheel. they'd run cooler


(doh) oh yeah, if weight becomes an issue, we could shave the gerbils, thus lowing the drag coefficient.hahaha

 

[katsmp3]

can we do a group buy

 

[derrick1623]

can we do a group buy

(rofl)(yippy), after testing...we will talk pricing. possibly a "dutch" ebay thing, like all the other high performance parts.hahahah

 

[LittleRedWagon5]

for you eyes only

after many days I managed to get a pic of a prototype german G-16CI.

This is classified, for your eyes only, tell no one outside the forum.

1. 4 lightweight titanium turbines, each capable of supporting 2 gerbils.
2. 300CFM Cooling Fan
3. Food and Water control shaft, gear driven.
3a. Nacho Cheese injector, 2sec. pulsewidth.
3b. Cold Water injector, 4 sec. pulsewidth.
4. Oil feed line for ball bearings on turbine wheels.
5. Food and Water couplings from wet tanks.
5a. Water storage tank, approx. 2 hrs of water for up to 8 Gerbils.
5b. Liquid Nacho Cheese Storage tank, up to 2 hrs for up to 8 Gerbils. Internally Heated from vehicle battery.
6. 5spd. Transmission
7. Limited Slip Diff.
8. Clutch assy.
9. Shift Forks

 

[enry]

Prehaps the off topic should be renamed the "too much free time" forum.

Well done nonetheless. If you need funding, I will chip in.

 

[Protege01MP3]

I have just discussed the idea of an electric "GE16" motor based on the G concept with my partner, derrick1623, and he approved the idea. I am formulating and laying out plans for this electric conterpart to the oh so popular G16. Stay Tuned for updates!

 

[Protege01MP3]

GE16 Writeup

here are the preliminary ideas of the GE16

Gerbil-electric power is electricity produced by the movement of Gerbils. Cheese causes gerbils to run forwards and this forward motion of gerbils in running wheels contains kinetic energy, that can be converted into mechanical energy, and then from mechanical energy into electrical energy in gerbil-electric power engines.

The conversion of kinetic energy into mechanical energy is not a new idea. As far back as the early nineties gerbils were used to convert kinetic energy into mechanical energy. The exact origin is not known, but the earliest reference to their use comes from Richard Geare.

below is a very early rendition of an idea for the revolutionary gerbil-electric powerplant that will soon be mounted under to hoods of every vehicle in the world!!

 

[MP3-Owner]

I think you should donate the first one off the line to the forum so we can raffle it off!!
The forum would make a killing with the demand of this set-up.

Maybe we could put the money we get from the raffle into a super duper gerbil powered server that would crank out 150GHZ!!

 

[spoolinmp3]

I think that 1000 wgp would be attainable if we used a multi-tubular maze labrinth lined with a highteck coating that has a higher drag coefficient resulting in the gerbils footsteps creating more kinetic energy thus creating overall more power.

The tubular maze should be contructed of a high tech material that has high tensile strength then shot peened for additional structural rigidity. After it should be coated with a high tech ceramic NASA coating that will prevent overheat when tranfering from kinetic to mechanical energy.

To finalize the project we should intoduze NAWWZZ man because this will give the gerbals a cheerful approach to there work and will be more efficient. The NAWWZZ high will also give more energy boost to the gerbals(about 69psi) subsequently giving a high output gerbal system.

What are your guys opininon on this??

 

[derrick1623]

spoolin...THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT!!! good call on da nawwwwz y0...i forgot about getting the gerbals high.


1000 wheel gerbal power...can you feel it???