The MAN Card - My Idea to Change America

[65racecoupe]

I was in Scottsdale tonight and had to help two metrosexuals change their tire. I loostened the lugs on the flat front tire, jacked the car up, finished loostening the lugs, and proceeded to pull off the tire. Well, the damn jack slipped and the car landed on the rotor.

The kid didn't even put on the E-Brake. I didn't think I even should have had to ask a freaking grown man. It was bad enough that I had to help two men change their tire, but the idiot didn't even put on the E-brake! (encourage

So....

I propose that all American able-bodied male citizens 18 and above should have to earn a "MAN CARD". You must earn the card by completing the following standards.

Change a tire on a passenger car.
Jump start a car.
Check the oil.
Complete 25 pushups and 3 pullups.
Know the name of the teams who won the last Super Bowl and World Series.
Throw a ball correctly - girly girl throwing form will be an automatic DQ



If you can think of anything else, list it?

 

[BradC]

Field-strip a sidearm?

Be turned on be a female.

Drive stick

 

[Moeed]

Eat greasy food and take showers, not baths.

know how to camp is a good one too, and start a fire so you dont freeze to death.

 

[SpicyMchaggis]

Field-strip a sidearm?

Be turned on be a female.

Drive stick

The ability to wield, clean, and properly use a firearm is essential. Driving stick, dead on.

Other notables.

Enjoy fishing, trout fishing in particular.

Eat's wings.

Enjoys a fine lager.

Can enjoy a 4 cylinder or a six, however knows deep down the dominance of a V8.

 

[JCell]

knows how to bbq

pink shirts = DQ

if he thinks tiptronic same as stickshift = DQ

 

[Rogue]

different levels of MAN cards

MAN

MANLY MAN

YOU DA MAN!

 

[Brian MP5T]

To Be able to use Suck Squeeze Bang Blow in a sentence...

 

[MiaTurbo]

has at least 5 scars with interesting stories behind each one.

 

[JCell]

^^ 3 of which must be car related

 

[jbiird317]

unhook a bra with one hand and eyes closed

pump gas (if youve ever met a frat guy from jersey you would understand this)

shotgun/funnel a beer

 

[Brian MP5T]

Burp His Name

 

[SpicyMchaggis]

To Be able to use Suck Squeeze Bang Blow in a sentence...

Squish, Squeeze..Damn canadians.

Owning "outfits", not only that, but spending more than 100$ on said "outfit" = DQ punishable by mockery.

 

[dbzeag]

Damn, I am screwed.

/saunters off without MAN CARD

 

[MSP #167]

kill a 6 pack easily

 

[dbzeag]

kill a 6 pack easily

What about downing a bottle of Crown Royal and chasing that with a few beers, puke, then drink some more?

Does a "rally" add points toward the MAN CARD?

 

[Pretzellogic]

Be able to jerry-rig anything so that it will work and work well.

At a restaurant, pull the chair out for a lady and pay for dinner. Stand up if she goes to the bathroom.

Change the oil on any car (I didn't see this one in the orginal list).

Be able to cook a really good meal.

 

[yesiownaskyline]

being able to piss-spell your name on an alley wall,

can PROPERLY rip duct tape,

has a definitive porn collection.

 

[cbcbd]

Piss in the shower

 

[SpicyMchaggis]

Be able to jerry-rig anything so that it will work and work well.

At a restaurant, pull the chair out for a lady and pay for dinner. Stand up if she goes to the bathroom.

Change the oil on any car (I didn't see this one in the orginal list).

Be able to cook a really good meal.

Can meet another car enthusiast, know who each other are without exchanging words, and settle on a flask of jameson within 3 minutes.

I call that progress.

 

[Brian MP5T]

Piss Vertically