I hate breakups.

[Gbourdon]

^^^ Good tunes Servo. Yep and it sure does huff nuts. I get hella pissed sometimes still and other times I feel fine. It's been about 3 months now but we lived together for almost 2 years. Never ever fought. She is just not ready to "settle down" whatever. They always come back but by then it will be too late for her so she loses. Her mom is even trying to hook me up with one of her friends. Ha! Wouldn't that suck for her.

 

[blynzoo]

Well, my car still doesn't boost right. My favorite song right now is Liar by Henry Rollins, it seems so... fitting.

CAUSE I'M A LIAR, A LIAR...

Love Rollins Band.

I'm going through the s*** too, man. I want to call her/email her, whatever, but told myself I would not. I broke up with her, and regret doing it. I dont know if I've been closer either. I was scared of this commitment thing, and now wish I had stayed with her.

enough sappy s***. Let's go get drunk as a skunk, man.

 

[servoeyes]

CAUSE I'M A LIAR, A LIAR...

Love Rollins Band.

I'm going through the s*** too, man. I want to call her/email her, whatever, but told myself I would not. I broke up with her, and regret doing it. I dont know if I've been closer either. I was scared of this commitment thing, and now wish I had stayed with her.

enough sappy s***. Let's go get drunk as a skunk, man.

Going to do that later tonight...hitting a *dance party*....supposedly the only good techno stuff in my area. Of course...she'll be there with her house mates, but I'm gonna see her tomorrow anyway. One last hoorah for Valentine's day...

 

[GAspeedProtege]

I was supposed to go to a concert with her tonight for some local band she likes, instead she wanted another friend to go with her and I can just stay home and rest. She wants to do something Saturday for Valentines... I'm starting to think that would be a bad idea.

 

[BadApple]

I fell for you....but dont worry like they allways say "There are plenty more fish in the sea" ...

 

[servoeyes]

I was supposed to go to a concert with her tonight for some local band she likes, instead she wanted another friend to go with her and I can just stay home and rest. She wants to do something Saturday for Valentines... I'm starting to think that would be a bad idea.

From the sound of your situation, yeah...it does. Don't let her tag you along...guys that react like this to break-ups (guys like you and me) will have no trouble finding other women, even if you don't want them...but it does give you confidence to move on. Look...if it was meant to be it will, right? I know it's cliche, but cliches happen not because the saying is overused...they become cliches because that's the way things work. Cliches just describe a common situation in life. Believe me...my first break-up sucked ass, but I learned a lot from it. This one isn't going nearly as bad, and I actually love this girl (unlike the first one).

It'll be alright...go see something inspirational...like Miracle or Return of the king. Or just go check out that hottie Michelle Trachtenberg in Eurotrip!

 

[dream merchant]

i know its tough, what helped me is a night out with the guys, go out to a club or something and youll soon realize thats theres more out there than what u had. 1yr relationship is tough to get over. i got over a 10yr relationship (includes 2yrs of marriage).

im with someone much better now and thats what im thankful for...

just keep your head up and try not to stay cooped up all night at home because then ur mind will make u dwell on things and how things used to be etc.. .that crap will eat u up inside... trust me i know.

 

[rt66protege]

Coming from someone who's NEVER had a meaningful relationship, I can say that single life isn't that bad. But I'm sorry to hear that things are going sour with your love. I bet it hurts a lot. But then again, I wouldn't necessarily know, never been in your shoes.

Enjoy being alone, enjoy spending time doing the things you want to do. You'll come through just fine. Good luck.

 

[cbcbd]

I know how you feel, I'm going through the same right now.

I broke up with her, thought I needed that, was wrong. I know she's the best thing that has happened to me, I've never felt so open and right with anyone like I do with her.
But... mistakes are made and lessons are learned. I'm giving her the space she needs as I seesaw between devastation of not being with her or having the chance to ever be with her again, and more self confidence and assurance that things will work out for the best in the end (but still hoping I'll be with her, at least as a friend for now).

My best advice for when you're in your lowest moments is to find the people who love you - that's your family and friends (the close ones). It's always good to distract yourself with a night out with the guys, but you'll only really feel better about yourself when you tell your mom/dad/bro/sis how you feel and they will tell you that everything will be fine, you're a good person, you'll come around, she'll come around, and we can only hope for the best.

If you have a close female friend then try to recruit her too- girls are much better at helpful listening and it's much easier to open up to them without you feeling like a pansy.

There are rough times and good times, it's sucks at the bottom, that's why we have people to help us - don't think you can battle this out alone, there are people who want to be there for you, find them!

Good luck, bro

 

[MisterT]

At least you found out now that you are both not for each other versus getting married or breaking up in an engagement. I know it sucks still. I got divorced a couple of years ago after 4 years of marriage or 10 years of being a couple! It was a blow to the self esteem, but now I know what I want in another woman versus from before.

 

[P5bob]

At 20, I got dumped after 2 yrs. Man, it killed me. But thank God for friends.
As someone said before, boys nites out are always a good start.
Keep your head up man.

 

[GAspeedProtege]

Yeah, I've been talking with this girl I work with more and more. I really feel for her, she's head over heels for this guy she used to and still is dating, but he's in another state and has cheated on her multiple times. She just can't let go. I've been thinking alot about it and I can't make up my mind, I want things to work out so we can be together, nothing ever felt more right than her. We were so into each other from the first day it just didn't seem like this would happen. I guess in the end it's my fault, I spent all of my time with her and now she wants to be with her friends. (dunno) Of course, out of all the things I remember the bad times the most, she's lied to me on multiple occasions lately, she's trying to meet all these people online and stuff. It sucks because that's exactly what she did to her last boyfriend. That was one thing I had against her, she always brought up her ex's. Come to think of it, this is our second *break* the first one involved the same "I need space." She went to her friends house and got drunk and when I went over there with my head spinning b/c I didn't know what was wrong all she kept telling me was I already told you whats wrong, just go to sleep. A few days later she told me she was so drunk she just wanted to cover my mouth so I would shutup. Funny, she's over at her friends house right now, more than likely drinking. Whatever, I hung out with my coworker and her friend tonight and that made me feel a lot better. I also got to drive my uncles camaro, all my problems went out the window when I was in that beast.

 

[servoeyes]

Yeah, I've been talking with this girl I work with more and more. I really feel for her, she's head over heels for this guy she used to and still is dating, but he's in another state and has cheated on her multiple times. She just can't let go. I've been thinking alot about it and I can't make up my mind, I want things to work out so we can be together, nothing ever felt more right than her. We were so into each other from the first day it just didn't seem like this would happen. I guess in the end it's my fault, I spent all of my time with her and now she wants to be with her friends. (dunno) Of course, out of all the things I remember the bad times the most, she's lied to me on multiple occasions lately, she's trying to meet all these people online and stuff. It sucks because that's exactly what she did to her last boyfriend. That was one thing I had against her, she always brought up her ex's. Come to think of it, this is our second *break* the first one involved the same "I need space." She went to her friends house and got drunk and when I went over there with my head spinning b/c I didn't know what was wrong all she kept telling me was I already told you whats wrong, just go to sleep. A few days later she told me she was so drunk she just wanted to cover my mouth so I would shutup. Funny, she's over at her friends house right now, more than likely drinking. Whatever, I hung out with my coworker and her friend tonight and that made me feel a lot better. I also got to drive my uncles camaro, all my problems went out the window when I was in that beast.

Dude...that's my first ex-girl you just described. Run as fast as you can...that kind of girl will only give you a mental break-down...like mine did. Please...take it from someone who went through it...get away and be safe. When you have a break-down you're never quite the same...you have to re-build...sometimes you're better, but it takes a while and a lot of help from friends and family.

Women like you described are the bane of all existance...they don't deserve to even be on this plane or reality. Here's a quote from my ex that my current ex told me way back when I was still not over the 1st:

Oh...I know Dan will always be there, so if I don't find anyone better then at least he's there.

That's paraphrased a bit, as I'm still sobering up from tonight and seeing current ex. Alcohol makes you forget...but not for nearly long enough, I've found. Anywho...you see my point, here? Guys like you and I (as far as I can tell) are succeptible to this kind of treatment. We're caring people, and we're not afraid of our emotions...that leaves us undefended at times. Stand up for yourself now, while you can. Realize that there are other girls out there and that you are better off with out her. My previous ex wrote me a card this year for christmas...said she wanted to talk. You know what...I have closure. If she needs it, **** her. That's the way you have to look at it, or it might bring you down the hard way.

Really...I wish you the best of luck, and I hope for the best for you, bud. Now if I could just stop shaking.......Go drive your car fast somewhere safe. It helped me a bit! Curves rule at high speeds...if you know what you're doing.

 

[pr5owner]

put all your time into your car.. thats what i did... went from

to

 

[Babygirl]

but good always comes from the bad...

I couldnt agree with you more!!! I just broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years and found someone else from the forums...heheheh. damn these forums!!! Things were going to s*** for years... it doesnt matter if you were together for a month or 100 years.... things just arent meant to be. Its better to let things go when they are bad... and not to drag things on for years in hope that things would get better. Cause more then likely it will never get better.

Things will be bad for awhile. My ex is still having a hard time. But you will realize it was for the best. There are millions of people out there.. and you will find the right one!!! I promise!! Good luck!! (flash)

 

[II-Savy]

"I really don't want to say this but when a girl needs "space" it's a license for her to go **** another guy."

BINGO.

Dude there are sooooooooooooooo many chicks out there it's not even funny. Forget it and move on. Don't waste your time feeling crappy and wondering what you did. NEXT! (flash)

 

[joeycooliss]

All i gotta say bud.....You gotta find yourself an "FTF". theyre the best..make all your sorrows go away.....its always good to get "some" from different girls....sometimes more than one at once (wink) ..... but you'll see, things will turn out....and plus....your only 19, theres plenty more girls out there for you I'm shure!

ps....FTF = friend to ****

Your friendly Canadian from Winnipeg! Joey (canada)

 

[GAspeedProtege]

Thanks for the advice y'all.