Whoever wrote the article forgot ..
1. The I Am An Almighty Biatch Douchebag (Male or Female) in their Cadillac Escalade, who thinks they're God's gift to the earth because OMG, do you see me in my UBAR-EXPENSIVE ESCUHLAYDE ROLLIN' ON DUUUUUBS WITH 25 TVS THAT I CAN'T EVEN SEE?!
2. The I'm Too Poor To Own A Car That's Actually TOGETHER Douchebag in their beat-to-s*** car with the bumpers held on by duct tape and smoke belching out of the exhaust every time they tap the gas and seran wrap and/or tarp used in place of a missing window.
3. The I'm Really Too Old To Be Operating This Vehicle Douchebag, who tends to drive anything that's as wide as 1.5 lanes -- yet their driving path wobbles and actually takes up about 2.5 lanes, despite the fact that the fastest they drive is 25mph. Oh, and they tend to have the lovely habit of driving with their chins superglued to the tops of their steering wheels, wearing sunglasses that cover 65% of their entire face.
And of course there's others, but those three are the first that came to mind.