Snaps

[adragonfly]

Ever read the "Book of Snaps" series? They're filled with "yo' mama.." type jokes and insults. I think they are so funny... here's a few I can remember... Some of them are pretty cruel, but others are just so funny! It's all in good fun - hope I don't offend anyone.

"Yo' mama so ugly, she couldn't get laid if she were a brick."

"Yo' mama's armpits are so hairy, she looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock!"

"Yo' teeth are so yellow... I can't believe it's not butter!"

"Yo' mama so fat, her belt size is equator!"

"Yo' mama so old, her social security number is 1."

"Yo' mama's chest is so hairy her tits look like coconuts!"

Anyone know any more funny snaps?

 

[sttl013]

Your Mama's so old her birthday's expired.

Your Mama's so old she's dreaming re-runs.

Your Mama's so fat she could roll over a dollar and make 4 quarters.

Yeah, I like this game.

 

[adragonfly]

Those are so funny!!! I guess no one else wants to play. here's a couple more anyway!

"Yo' mama is so ugly that her tears run upwards and around the back of her head because they're too afraid to run down her face!"

"Yo' mama is so skinny, she could hula hoop in a Cheerio!"

"Yo' mama is so skinny, she could hang glide with a Dorito!"

"Yo' mama is so dirty, that when she gets into the bathtub she makes gravy!

 

[tritonheat1]

Yo mama is is so ugly, Stevie Wonder said DAMM...........lol

Yo mama is so fat when she stepped on the scale it said( to be continued.

Yo mama is like a shotgun.....one cock one blow.

yo mama is like a doorknob....everybody get's a turn.

yo sista is like a racecar........ she burns 8rubbers a day.

Yo mama is so stupid she took a ruler to bed.......to see how long she could sleep.

Yo mama is so nasty..........she brought crabs to the beach.

yo mama is so fat.......she used a bedmattress, as a maxipad.

yo mama is so poor.........she put a peanut on layway.

yo mama is so poor when u and your sista came home, u said ma what's fo dinner..............she put her foot on the table and said toe jam.

 

[fastdrvr23]

I only have two, but I like them...

Your mama is so fat... we used to take her to the beach and sell shade.

Your mama is so dirty... she could leave a fingerprint on charcoal.

 

[adragonfly]

this is definately one of those threads that I have to avoid while I'm at work! It's the weekend now, so I'm at home, but I am laughing my ass off at these snaps you guys are posting. I just know I won't be able to control myself at the office if the ones to come are as funny as these.

 

[MP3intheSTL]

YO MAMA

Yo Mama so skinny she has to run around the shower to get wet.

Yo Mama so stuiped she asked me what kind of pants I was wearing I said guess, she said levi's.

 

[Kooldino]

Re: YO MAMA

wearing I said guess, she said levi's.

Don't get that one...

Anyway, Yo momma is so skanky, that she'll put a cucumber in her snatch and pull out a pickle.

 

[adragonfly]

Re: Re: YO MAMA

Don't get that one...

Anyway, Yo momma is so skanky, that she'll put a cucumber in her snatch and pull out a pickle.

"Guess" as in the brand, but she actually took a guess after he already told her.

 

[MP3intheSTL]

SNAPS

THANKS adragonfly
didn't get to reply in time, I thought it was funny.

 

[adragonfly]

I thought it was pretty funny, too, but jokes lose their humor sometimes when you have to explain them. I have to do that quite often because I think I have bad delivery. I can never get to the end of my own jokes because I make myself laugh before I get to the punchline!

 

[Syzygy]

I thought it was pretty funny, too, but jokes lose their humor sometimes when you have to explain them. I have to do that quite often because I think I have bad delivery. I can never get to the end of my own jokes because I make myself laugh before I get to the punchline!

Jokes are very difficult to pull off in print, anyway. The essence of a joke is the delivery, the timing...

Geez...in a post, a person can jump to the punchline and skip the setup. Just seems unfair...

 

[adragonfly]

Jokes are very difficult to pull off in print, anyway. The essence of a joke is the delivery, the timing...

Geez...in a post, a person can jump to the punchline and skip the setup. Just seems unfair...

Believe it or not, I'm better in print because I can make it through to the end without laughing so hard that people can't understand me!

 

[Syzygy]

Believe it or not, I'm better in print because I can make it through to the end without laughing so hard that people can't understand me!

You must tell some great jokes!

 

[bd4awgn]

yo mama is so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone

yo mama is so small you can see here feet in her drivers license picture

yo mama is so black she has to wear white gloves to eat a tootsie roll

yo mama is so poor they put her picture on foodstamps

yo mama is so skinny her nipples touch

yo sister is like a tv even a two year old can turn her on

yo mama is so stupid that on a job aplication under "Education" she put "Hooked on Phonics"

yo mama is so ugly that when she walks into a bank they turn off the surveilance camera

yo mamas house is so dusty the roaches ride around on dune buggies

yo mama is so fat that when she wears a red dress, people yell "Hey Kool-aid Man"

yo mama is so bald I can read her mind

yo mama is so fat her bellybutton has an echo

 

[MP3intheSTL]

laugh

those are some good ones

 

[adragonfly]

BD4awgn - those are soooo funny! I'm going to get into trouble now cause I just read this and I have to go to a meeting! I can't stop laughing so I'm trying to compose myself before I go! Already late and they're waiting but I'm cracking up like a nut! What am I going to do?!!!

 

[tritonheat1]

Yo mama is so damm dumb she went to summer school in the winter.

Yo mama is so damm dumb she told me to meet her at the corner of walk and don't walk.

yo mama is so damm big she climb mount fuji with one step.

yo mama is so fat, she dj's for the ice cream truck.

yo mama is so fat, she don't where a g-string she wears a ABCDEFG-String.

yo mama is so fat, she masturbates to a cook book.

yo mama is so fat, she don't know whether she's walking or rolling.

yo mama is so nasty a skunk smelt her ass and passed out.

yo mama is so fat, she has her own area code.

yo mama is so fat, she got hit by a truck and she asked who threw that rock.

yo mama is so fat, she jumped in the ocean and the ocean jumped back and said i'll wait my turn..

 

[adragonfly]

OMG!!! I can't stop laughing! I'm going to get fired soon. Around here no one closes their office doors, but now I have to because I don't want my boss to think I'm goofing off all day (even though I am!) Keep them coming, please! This car forum has changed my whole work day! It's never been so much fun!

 

[Syzygy]

OMG!!! I can't stop laughing! I'm going to get fired soon. Around here no one closes their office doors, but now I have to because I don't want my boss to think I'm goofing off all day (even though I am!) Keep them coming, please! This car forum has changed my whole work day! It's never been so much fun!

There you go enjoying your job again...silly you!