Dumbest thing you have ever said to a cop...after getting stopped.
- Thread starter intergalacthis
- Start date
I was in my P5 watching a street race going down between a mach 1 and a WS6 there my friends so I was like whatever when they both lunch and on the other side of the highway there is a state trooper coming in the opposite direction I was like holy s*** they booked it and I did'nt want to run from the cops so I proceed to getaway at the speed limit! LOL did'nt work. The cops asked me what I was doing just watching the race I responded officer what did you want me to do those guys were doing crazy burnouts I could'nt pass them that could have been dangerous. Yeah he did'nt buy that s*** being that it was like 3 a.m. and there was barely anyone on the roads.
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I got a ticket for spinning my tires out of a side street. I was driving a Geo Metro. I told him that the ticket was "just assinine" he was sure to let the judge know that when I went to court. Ended up making the ticket out for road racing.
Almost, he was like I'am going to run you in the database so becareful blah blah this is a warning they passed a new law here in New York State blah blah but I was scared s*** less. Luckly I got off with a warning, thank god I was driving my P5 and not some damn camaro or mustang then I would have definitley been ******.Togan said:
Well this story really has nothing to do with driving but it involves cops at least 
We are at a bar in Wasaga Beach a few years back(big hotspot in Canada during the summer) I think there was 6 of us there. Anyway 4 of us were totally $hitfaced and when we went outside for a second the bouncers would not let us back in because we were so trashed. So me and one of my buddies get real mouthy with the bouncer (the guy was bigger than both us together) and next thing I know there is like 5 cops next to us telling us to go away or they were going to take us to the drunk tank. So brilliant me says occifer I'm occiffied (saw that in some movie) and they did not think it was that funny. The one cop was just about to handcuff me and my friend when one of our female freinds came up and said hey big boy to the cop and grabbed him by the ass(spank), the look on the cops face was priceless (shocked). The other cops started pissing themselves laughing (rlaugh) and then the cop told us to get lost or he really was going to take us this time. We got the hell out of there in a hurry, we ended up sleeping in a ditch that night (shrug) I will never forget what I remember of that night(thumb)
We are at a bar in Wasaga Beach a few years back(big hotspot in Canada during the summer) I think there was 6 of us there. Anyway 4 of us were totally $hitfaced and when we went outside for a second the bouncers would not let us back in because we were so trashed. So me and one of my buddies get real mouthy with the bouncer (the guy was bigger than both us together) and next thing I know there is like 5 cops next to us telling us to go away or they were going to take us to the drunk tank. So brilliant me says occifer I'm occiffied (saw that in some movie) and they did not think it was that funny. The one cop was just about to handcuff me and my friend when one of our female freinds came up and said hey big boy to the cop and grabbed him by the ass(spank), the look on the cops face was priceless (shocked). The other cops started pissing themselves laughing (rlaugh) and then the cop told us to get lost or he really was going to take us this time. We got the hell out of there in a hurry, we ended up sleeping in a ditch that night (shrug) I will never forget what I remember of that night(thumb)
rustychops41
Member
- :
- 2007 Mazda 3s HB
The best one I ever heard was: A guy is stopped on the shoulder of the interstate, taking a whiz, which he apparently does quite often being on the road for a living. He doesn't see/hear the cop pull up, get out, and walk right up to him, catching him "mid-stream." The cop says "You know, that's a $250.00 fine in this state." The guy whizzing says to the cop, "Well hell, I must owe you guys about a million dollars by now." The cop laughed so hard he supposedly let the guy off with a warning. I read this in Car & Driver so I can't vouch for the truthfulness. 
Female officer pulled me and a friend over about 2 months ago and she was fuggin hot!!!
she comes up to the car...
Cop: Sir, you were 23 mph over the legal speed limit. where are you headed in such a hurry?
Me: Nice Tits!(doh)
Cop: Sir, please remain in your car with your hands on the steering wheel *(as she calls for backup)*
ME: can we start over, you go back to your car and when you come back i can compliment you on your ass to!(spank)
sad to say that was not the brightest thing to say to her...back up arrived, and after 40 min. latter and one high dollar ticket i was free to go!(rofl)
she comes up to the car...
Cop: Sir, you were 23 mph over the legal speed limit. where are you headed in such a hurry?
Me: Nice Tits!(doh)
Cop: Sir, please remain in your car with your hands on the steering wheel *(as she calls for backup)*
ME: can we start over, you go back to your car and when you come back i can compliment you on your ass to!(spank)
sad to say that was not the brightest thing to say to her...back up arrived, and after 40 min. latter and one high dollar ticket i was free to go!(rofl)
DragonWagon54
Member
- :
- Manual PRO5 (sold)
I was cruising to San Luis Obispo for MARDI GRAS a couple months ago. As u may not know, SLO's celebration is the 2nd biggest in the nation(behind new orleans). It is normally about a 4 1/2 hour drive from my hometown in so cali but i cruised at a chill 100mph the whole way. Myself being a dumbass i didnt slow down when i got to SLO was tailgating an suv. In front of the SUV was a California State Sheriff. The trooper pulled both myself and the SUV over and i was the first he talked to.
Trooper: Why r u going so fast?
Me: i was in a hurry to drink and see boobs.
Trooper: Ya they are always nice but be careful, many people have died this year due to speed problems on this road.
Me: thats a bummer, i see awesome crashes on NASCAR all the time. U like nascar?
Trooper: It doesnt really matter does it?
Me: No but if u did ud realize i was saving gas by following u guys in a line. Its called drafting and its quite fun.
Trooper: Now why the **** whould i wanna know something as stupid as that. Ill be right back with your ticket
Me: under my breath as he' walking away, whata ******* hater.
Trooper
gun Drawn) get the **** outta the car and put ur face in the dirt
Not a fun situation since i got a ticket for going 95 in a 65 zone and i got caught for minor in possession of alcohol. At least the weekend was full of 3 kegs and sooo many nice boobies. (mj)
Trooper: Why r u going so fast?
Me: i was in a hurry to drink and see boobs.
Trooper: Ya they are always nice but be careful, many people have died this year due to speed problems on this road.
Me: thats a bummer, i see awesome crashes on NASCAR all the time. U like nascar?
Trooper: It doesnt really matter does it?
Me: No but if u did ud realize i was saving gas by following u guys in a line. Its called drafting and its quite fun.
Trooper: Now why the **** whould i wanna know something as stupid as that. Ill be right back with your ticket
Me: under my breath as he' walking away, whata ******* hater.
Trooper
gun Drawn) get the **** outta the car and put ur face in the dirtNot a fun situation since i got a ticket for going 95 in a 65 zone and i got caught for minor in possession of alcohol. At least the weekend was full of 3 kegs and sooo many nice boobies. (mj)
Khoifather
Member
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- Mazda Protege5
Amazing stories my friends =D
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- Das Pretzelwagon
"No officer, I didn't know I was speeding..."
i got pulled over in FL, an i swear i wasnt going more then 5mph over, he claimed i was doing 15 over.. i called him Dood when i was talking to him... lets just say he didnt like that. next thing you know i got a 185$ ticket, and a pissed of cop. I was out of state so i couldnt fight it unless i was will to go to FL.
Now i call cops sir or officer.. let that be a lesson to all.
Now i call cops sir or officer.. let that be a lesson to all.
It went like this:
Officer: Do you know why I stopped you?
1sty: Actualy sir I am a little confused as to why.
Officer: Well, how fast where you going?
1sty: *Answering honestly* no more then 75 except for when I accelerated around the truck when you where right on my bumber while I was passing him.
Officer: What about when you got on the highway at Exit 1 and you cut between 2 vehicals at around 85 with no blinker?
1sty: OH! You saw that?
No ticket for that one
Another encounter, this time almost getting arrested for reckless driving.
Officer: TURN THE CAR OFF!
1sty: *nervous as all hell* ITS OFF!(boom06)
Officer: TURN THE ******* CAR OFF:
1sty: ITS OFF SIR(boom06)
Officer: TAKE THE KEYS OUT OF THE IGNITION!
1sty: *sees 9mm pointed at my head, takes keys out of ignition and throws them at the passenger window in a panic* THEY'RE OUT!!
Officer: Do you know why I stopped you?
1sty: Actualy sir I am a little confused as to why.
Officer: Well, how fast where you going?
1sty: *Answering honestly* no more then 75 except for when I accelerated around the truck when you where right on my bumber while I was passing him.
Officer: What about when you got on the highway at Exit 1 and you cut between 2 vehicals at around 85 with no blinker?
1sty: OH! You saw that?
No ticket for that one
Another encounter, this time almost getting arrested for reckless driving.
Officer: TURN THE CAR OFF!
1sty: *nervous as all hell* ITS OFF!(boom06)
Officer: TURN THE ******* CAR OFF:
1sty: ITS OFF SIR(boom06)
Officer: TAKE THE KEYS OUT OF THE IGNITION!
1sty: *sees 9mm pointed at my head, takes keys out of ignition and throws them at the passenger window in a panic* THEY'RE OUT!!
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sunlight_guy
Member
Cop: Have you had anything to drink tonight?
Reply: No thanks officer, I've had enough tonight already.
Reply: No thanks officer, I've had enough tonight already.
- :
- Das Pretzelwagon
*wonders why no one has told the "Policeman's Ball" joke yet*
P-Malatesta
Banned
DragonWagon54 said:I was cruising to San Luis Obispo for MARDI GRAS a couple months ago. As u may not know, SLO's celebration is the 2nd biggest in the nation(behind new orleans). It is normally about a 4 1/2 hour drive from my hometown in so cali but i cruised at a chill 100mph the whole way. Myself being a dumbass i didnt slow down when i got to SLO was tailgating an suv. In front of the SUV was a California State Sheriff. The trooper pulled both myself and the SUV over and i was the first he talked to.
Trooper: Why r u going so fast?
Me: i was in a hurry to drink and see boobs.
Trooper: Ya they are always nice but be careful, many people have died this year due to speed problems on this road.
Me: thats a bummer, i see awesome crashes on NASCAR all the time. U like nascar?
Trooper: It doesnt really matter does it?
Me: No but if u did ud realize i was saving gas by following u guys in a line. Its called drafting and its quite fun.
Trooper: Now why the **** whould i wanna know something as stupid as that. Ill be right back with your ticket
Me: under my breath as he' walking away, whata ******* hater.
Trooper
Not a fun situation since i got a ticket for going 95 in a 65 zone and i got caught for minor in possession of alcohol. At least the weekend was full of 3 kegs and sooo many nice boobies. (mj)
where is darwinism when you need it?
TiGrayMsp716
Member
- :
- 03.5 Titanium MSP
I was leaving a movie one night and decided to take the back way home. A bunch of riced out 80's 4 door civics want to race. I actually ignored them then they did a fly by.
Then I noticed crown vic headlights pulling up behind me and something on the roof. I was going about 60 in a 45. So I thought that he was going to pass me. yeah did I mention I was driving my old 2000 si with 5% limo tint, I/H/E and dropped about 2 inches. So now he decides to pace me and slows down.
After couple of songs on the radio he's still pacing me and I'm getting agitated. We coming up to a hard turn ( you know the yellow warning signs and lower speed limit 25mph) I decided I wasn't going to slow down. I think that might have pissed him off because after i hear his tires squeal the magically lights come on.
Officer: You know why I pulled you over?
Me: No Sir
Officer: Theres been a lot of street racing on this road late at night?
Me: Really? Street racing.
Officer: We've been trying to crack down on it.
Me: So I was racing?
Officer: I noticed you and a bunch of cars leave the movies together.
Me: Well there was a lot of people at the movie.
Me: So how fast was I going?
Officer: I clocked you at 60.
Me: I was going 60 the whole time you where following me. So how was i racing?
Officer: License and registration please.
Then I noticed crown vic headlights pulling up behind me and something on the roof. I was going about 60 in a 45. So I thought that he was going to pass me. yeah did I mention I was driving my old 2000 si with 5% limo tint, I/H/E and dropped about 2 inches. So now he decides to pace me and slows down.
After couple of songs on the radio he's still pacing me and I'm getting agitated. We coming up to a hard turn ( you know the yellow warning signs and lower speed limit 25mph) I decided I wasn't going to slow down. I think that might have pissed him off because after i hear his tires squeal the magically lights come on.
Officer: You know why I pulled you over?
Me: No Sir
Officer: Theres been a lot of street racing on this road late at night?
Me: Really? Street racing.
Officer: We've been trying to crack down on it.
Me: So I was racing?
Officer: I noticed you and a bunch of cars leave the movies together.
Me: Well there was a lot of people at the movie.
Me: So how fast was I going?
Officer: I clocked you at 60.
Me: I was going 60 the whole time you where following me. So how was i racing?
Officer: License and registration please.
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