Cheating Spouse

[mckraut]

My line in the sand is this - if I am saying something to a woman that I wouldn't say with my wife standing right there next to us, I probably shouldn't be saying it. Now having said that, I am a bit of a flirt. But the wife understands this and I never take it over the line. I flirt with girls in front of her, just to see her eyes roll back into her head and laugh at me.

 

[Reyan]

Cheaters never win.

 

[laracroft]

Well realtor called and said the rent was not paid for this month like he said he would do. So at the end of this month, that's it for me. I don't want to get evicted, and I don't trust him to keep him promises OBVIOUSLY. So my son and I will be heading to Orlando sooner than I'd hoped. The realtor needs to show the place to other people interested in renting there and I can only oblige. Hopefully I can find another job in another town quickly and get my stuff packed and moved. I have an apt I can stay at over there - but's a one bedroom. So my son and I will be on the floor and couch. But at least it will be a change of scenery and a chance at something new.

 

[evilmonkeyMSP]

wow, that was ******* swell of him....what a doosh.

 

[CHICO2003]

I could be wrong (and I hope I am! <eg>) but... I get the sense that you're not a vindictive/spiteful person. Seems like you're willing to let bygones be bygones and move on. I'm not saying that's the wrong approach to take. But at the same time... Hell, if it was me... lol well, you can probably figure out where I'm going with this. As much as it might suck to hear guys... You, being a woman, are in a position of power. You (obviously) will maintain custody of your son. (With the exception of a few cases... OJ being the most notable... courts don't usually reward douchebag losers.) So... if you wanted to... you could SO take him and his napolean complex for a long and painful ride. Can't pay alimony? Say bye to your precious 'ghost mobile'! and that's just the tip of the iceberg. I'm no divorce lawyer... but one of my best friends is. With all the knowledge he's bestowed... I could probably be one! The stories he's told... forget about it!!


But anyway... enough of my "take him down to chinatown" crap. do what you feel is right. Though I'm given plenty of evidence everyday to the contrary... I'd like to believe there's some cosmic force out there (call it karma) that'll take care of these pos F'ers! haha but hey... we can't always rely on the universe! sometimes... a sign on a bus is more effective! ; ) Good luck

 

[tiagotiago]

It upsets me when smart, atractive girls that have everything going for them fall in love with a complete imbecile. Several close friends of mine qualify in that group, and from what I read in this thread, I dare say you'd fit that description too.

I find it a bit pointless to say "men are like that" or "women are like that" because in reality it's just part of human nature to do screwed up things in regards to relationships. And even though to an outsider it may be obvious that a relationship is dead, one part sometimes clings to false hope that things will get better. It's never easy if you're the side who thinks things can still be salvaged, and from what I've seen, you have good days and terrible days for some time to come.

But I think it's great you're going to live to a new place, for sure that will help, and it's good you're seeking support from other people. Some might find it usefull to talk to a doctor about all this, you might want to think about this too, I know it helped my friends deal with their issues. Also, you might want to pick up a new hobby? Have you been thinking about taking dance lessons for some time? Singing?? Going to a track day?? Skydiving?? Now's the time for you to pick up on it

...and I'm happy to report that those friends who I've just compared you to are thriving once again. Keep your head up, let your friends support and love you and no dobut you'll be in good shape after a while.

PS: If you want to be reminded what love and loyalty feels like, get a dog

 

[laracroft]

We have a dog and I have to give him up. I've had him for 5 years and he was apart of the family.

Now I have to give him up. I can't take him to a 1 bdrm apt at my friends place. I have someone interested, but she has a cat. He hates cats. Trust me, I cried about giving him up, but I can't keep him. Even looking at him hurts. He stays by the front door whining with his head in his paws thinking my ex will come walking through the front door any minute. It really pisses me off that even the dog is depressed and didn't know any better about him too. Between my son crying about having to leave his friends in the neighborhood and school, the dog whining at the front door and all his crap still in the house (except his bed, big screen and clothes) - it just drives me nuts to see the devastation he left behind.

I hope that karma catches up to that f*** soon. Well, unless the lawyers do it first.

 

[Reyan]

Sucks you have to give up the dog. Couldn't you just give up the man. lol (just try to make you smile).

 

[JunZ33]

Lol!!

 

[CHICO2003]

Ok... that's the last straw!

You're telling me (us) that he not only cut off the rent and insurance... and oh yeah, left his F'in SON!! but also left a... dog???

My wife drives me crazy. I mean... she drives me absolutely nuts! she knows all the right buttons and loves to press em all... sometimes all at once! But you know something? Despite all that... there's no way in HELL I'd consider leaving her. Sure, deep down the love is still alive and well so what I just said is somewhat tongue and cheek but more importantly... I've got 2 kids and a dog. Absolutely no way in hell I'm living apart from them!! God damn... can't even imagine.

Ugh... but anyway. Judging by his actions, your son will be fine and probably better off in the long run. As for your dog... I know you said you can't take him but I beg you... try to find a way. I'm admittedly (and proudly) an extremist when it comes to animal rights and everything related... Like you said, your dog is a part of your family. Can you find him a good/new home? Certainly. Will your dog miss you and your son every waking day? Absolutely!

One of the (many) reasons dogs are so beloved has to do with their human-like quality of growing attached to people. You don't really see it (as much) with cats and most other animals aren't even close. We, of course, love this quality about them because it makes us feel good. (the whole tail waggin, jumpin like a maniac cuz you came home treatment). Because of this quality... they can easily (like you described) become depressed. (just like people!) So you take the good with the bad. Now I realize a dog isn't a person. Even I, crazy vegan peta freak know that. But still... and I know this may sound harsh (especially with what you're going through... I apologize in advance. I'm sure I'll get flamed for saying this but...

would you leave your son behind?

It's the same logic I use whenever I hear about an owner putting their dog to sleep because it bit someone. Now look, obviously there are some extremely dangerous dogs out there that perhaps... perhaps need to be put down. But most times, the poor dog was merely startled or what have you... Just like people, dogs can make mistakes. Are we gonna put Johnny down if he punches some kid on the playground?

So I know you have a lot on your plate and you don't need me telling you what to do with your dog but please at least reconsider. Perhaps it won't be as bad as you think. After all, you're blessed with an amazing climate almost year round... meaning you can take your dog to the park virtually anytime. (up here in CT we get a whopping 5-6 months a year if we're lucky to enjoy the outdoors. Clearly having a big dog in a small apt wouldn't work around here. Down south though... your living space is greatly enhanced by the outdoors. So perhaps it can work. Maybe you can let someone 'temporarily' watch your dog while you get situated... and then figure out if you might be able to manage... I know it's a lot to ask of one person. With 2 twin babies and a dog... hell, if my wife left me I'd have to quit my job just to handle it all. Hopefully you're moving to orlando because you have family to help you. Now more than ever, you need a good support system.

But anyway.... only you know what's best for you and your son.. and your dog.

 

[Maxx Mazda]

Is Lara gonna have to choke a b****?

Seriously though;

I've been on "both sides" of the cheating scenerio. Without sounding like a dink, I'm glad I cheated for only one reason. I will NEVER do it again. It was the worst mistake of my life... Everything I was going to say to you has basically been said already, but I think you are conducting yourself really well given the circumstance.

Your son is and always will be the most important man in your life. Don't forget that.

 

[laracroft]

Lol!!

Get the **** off the website. You have your car, your b**** and your own forum. I don't go there anymore, so get out of mine.

 

[yashart_mp3]

It upsets me when smart, atractive girls that have everything going for them fall in love with a complete imbecile. Several close friends of mine qualify in that group, and from what I read in this thread, I dare say you'd fit that description too.

I find it a bit pointless to say "men are like that" or "women are like that" because in reality it's just part of human nature to do screwed up things in regards to relationships. And even though to an outsider it may be obvious that a relationship is dead, one part sometimes clings to false hope that things will get better. It's never easy if you're the side who thinks things can still be salvaged, and from what I've seen, you have good days and terrible days for some time to come.

But I think it's great you're going to live to a new place, for sure that will help, and it's good you're seeking support from other people. Some might find it usefull to talk to a doctor about all this, you might want to think about this too, I know it helped my friends deal with their issues. Also, you might want to pick up a new hobby? Have you been thinking about taking dance lessons for some time? Singing?? Going to a track day?? Skydiving?? Now's the time for you to pick up on it

...and I'm happy to report that those friends who I've just compared you to are thriving once again. Keep your head up, let your friends support and love you and no dobut you'll be in good shape after a while.

PS: If you want to be reminded what love and loyalty feels like, get a dog

Thank you for posting this. I couldn't find a way to word it nicely and you nailed it, so thank you! I couldn't agree more with you.... As an outsider looking in, it is easy to see that this relationship was doomed (and I think Lara even saw this) but held on, hoping that one day things would be right. It's amazing how blinded we can sometimes be when following our heart, regardless of the writing on the walls...

Truth be told, he did you a favor by leaving. He saved you many headaches and long battles. Marriage is not easy, and you have to be committed and dedicated to it....which he obviously wasn't. Referring to "you and your son" just boggles my mind. How can you not only marry, but claim to truly and completely love someone, and not take your child as his own.

Although you probably don't want to hear this, in the end it works out for best for both you (and your son) and Ghost. He got out of a situation/relationship that he was not committed to (and no longer wanted to be in) and he forced you to accept the truth - that the relationship is dead and had no future. You both deserve to be happy. And although the way he went about leaving was totally wrong, he will have to face the music and the consequences for his actions. I know it hurts, but it will get better with time.

I am sorry to hear this happened to you, but keep your head up. Life is too short. Enjoy your blessings and live life to its fullest. I wish you the best of luck

 

[JunZ33]

Get the **** off the website. You have your car, your b**** and your own forum. I don't go there anymore, so get out of mine.

You need to come to grips with reality and truth. There are alot of facts that you leave off of here intentionally to make yourself look like a victim. I really dont want to continue. You have done enough damage for one night, but the effect that you were looking for is not going to happen. Just give it up Christine. Now you can have the 2.5 children you want with the pickett fence, and a dog. You should be greatfull instead of spitefull. We had nothing for a long time, the only thing your going to be out of is someone that pays the rent and keeps you in your little status quo. Enjoy your new life, I know im enjoying mine. Im not going to come in here and destroy you through words.

 

[ForceFed]

Lol!!

Dude....You have always been an arrogant dick.

You havent been welcome here in a long time.

Move..the ****...Along.

 

[Rush]

Dude....You have always been an arrogant dick.

You havent been welcome here in a long time.

Move..the ****...Along.

QFT.

 

[ForceFed]

QFT.

Are you kidding me....Tell me you are.

 

[laracroft]

You need to come to grips with reality and truth. There are alot of facts that you leave off of here intentionally to make yourself look like a victim. I really dont want to continue. You have done enough damage for one night, but the effect that you were looking for is not going to happen. Just give it up Christine. Now you can have the 2.5 children you want with the pickett fence, and a dog. You should be greatfull instead of spitefull. We had nothing for a long time, the only thing your going to be out of is someone that pays the rent and keeps you in your little status quo. Enjoy your new life, I know im enjoying mine.

I'm glad you are. And no, your reality was not the same as mine. You had everything you wanted but you DEMANDED more. Not asked for more. One minute you were happy, the next screaming at us for no reason. You're a programmed marine prick that will never change - a ticking time bomb that's disguised as a nice guy for about a month. You make rash decisions depending on the time of day and then get pissed when you have to live with those decisions. I'm tired of being your excuse why things didn't work out. I wasn't the problem only the means for you to point your finger.

You're right, I did want a family and you couldn't give me that. But to do the crap you've been doing for years behind my back because you weren't "happy", that makes you a cheater. In actual deed or not, you'll never change. And I've got lots of women that tell me so. I'm sure Matt was right about Heather too - why even mention it. But it probably didn't work out so well, and then you quit her. I now believe that you were playing games from the start. That's why you didn't get everything you wanted. You hated my son, hated responsibilities, never wanted to hear me ask about all those girls and hidden phone calls and simply wanted a piece of ass that you call "love". Well, now you got your ***** than you've only known for 3 weeks that you're head over heels over and you can move on. I'm sure she doesn't want the white picket fence and "pipe" dream either because apparently she was happy to ruin mine. But you'll be gone when she's done with you.

Unlike you, I don't need someone to justify who I am or where I need to be. You were a mistake from the get-go and hid everything well. I have my faults, but I never did anything like this to you. I could care less about YOUR happiness, I want my own. So now I want to be selfish like you and be able to find someone who'll appreciate wanting a family and being generally happy and not pissed off all the time and calling us names. I wanted an unbiased opinion from everyone and I got it. You're sick and you need to stop harrassing me. Go live your wet dream elsewhere with the ghetto rat.

 

[Rush]

Are you kidding me....Tell me you are.

?

 

[kipper88]

Are you kidding me....Tell me you are.

i think she meant 'quoted for truth' not 'quit f-ing talking'.