broke up with my girlfriend
- Thread starter tyusha
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laracroft said:I have a strong belief that there is that one person who is meant for each and every one of us. Sometimes it takes a few tries to get it right. Have faith that she's still out there and this just opens it up for you to find her.
With all due respect Lara....That is some BullS!@# right there.......there is no one perfect person out there, The Idea of Soulmate is asinine....and as mythological as BIG FOOT.
The truth of the matter is you meet someone they become a friend, you two decide to take it to the next step, and ya end up getting married..yes folks it's actually that simple....There is no Romeo and Juliet/ Cinderella Fairy tale Love. This is the real world, and in that real world you do what you do to improve your own self worth, and she does the same..It's all about what you two bring to table not so much "Oh I'm so in love it's unbelievable". In actually It's the mushy mushy, I can't stand to be away from him type of relationships that tend to fizzle out and die..because you get burned out being with the person, trust me I was in that kind of farce not cool..... (notcool)
I give you props for being honest with yourself and deciding this woman just wasn't the right one for you. It may hurt in the shortterm, but it's actually the proper and respectful thing to do for you and her. Neither of you may see that now, but more than likely will in the future.
If things are meant to be, they will. Frankly, I want someone who wants to be with me for who I am and what I'm about. I've tried catering, molding, shaping myself, etc...into what women want and it hasn't and doesn't work for me. I always felt like I was the one doing all of the work and I wasn't enjoying being around/with the women.
A relationship with a woman should be pleasurable experience overall. Yes, it takes work, but fairly equal work on both parts.
Consider yourself lucky and fortunate you haven't come out of this with an alimony and a child support payment due every month.
You'll be much wiser the next time you get involved with someone else. Besides, your young and just getting your life started. What you want now may not be what you want five years from now.
If things are meant to be, they will. Frankly, I want someone who wants to be with me for who I am and what I'm about. I've tried catering, molding, shaping myself, etc...into what women want and it hasn't and doesn't work for me. I always felt like I was the one doing all of the work and I wasn't enjoying being around/with the women.
A relationship with a woman should be pleasurable experience overall. Yes, it takes work, but fairly equal work on both parts.
Consider yourself lucky and fortunate you haven't come out of this with an alimony and a child support payment due every month.
You'll be much wiser the next time you get involved with someone else. Besides, your young and just getting your life started. What you want now may not be what you want five years from now.
yeah, we know, like we've NEVER heard THAT one before.
(deadhorse
Its only been on every "I broke up with my girlfriend" thread since the inception of the forum....but some guys never get tired of saying it. Must have a nice ring to it.
But on the up side... there are a million web pages of why men suck.... I've read some of them, and they're hilarious. If it makes you feel better and not alone in thinking the opposite sex sucks,... look it up. Just type "men suck", there are over 10,000,000 pages. lol
J dragon said:
Not to say that the person thats meant for you will be a fairy tale story. But here's why you're wrong and at least in my case:
I met a regular guy back in 1994 while in school in California and in the military. We had a brief conversation and he was to me, one of about a thousand other Marines and Soldiers stationed at the base that had tried to talk to me. But I specifically remember meeting him, talking to him at an arcade and him asking if I wanted a ride back to base. I declined and went on my business. I had a boyfriend at the time and didnt see him again after that.
In 1995, the following year, I was stationed in Okinawa Japan. There are several bases in Oki and he was assigned again, to my base and my same unit. I did not see him, but he remembered seeing me. He found out I was now married and did not say more than two words to me while there. He gets married later that year and goes to Camp Lejune in North Carolina. I got stationed at Cherry Point North Carolina... only 45 minutes away.
In 1997 I went through my divorce. While back in his life, he went through his also the same year.
In 1998, I was working at a store while waiting on the police academy in Miami Florida. A friend of mine and myself were playing with a Quiji board in the back office (yeah, I know, we were goofing off... lol ). I asked the board about when another guy would come in my life. It said soon. I asked what his name would be. It said Miguel. Well, Miguel was the name of my ex husband, so I said... nope, never getting back with THAT guy. It said we'd get married. I said "damnit, I already TRIED that and he's a LOSER!" So I forgot about it. lol
A few weeks later, a guy walks into the same store and keeps looking at me while he's working on a security system there. The girl that I work with kept "accidentially" setting off the alarm and the alarm company thought to send someone over to fix the sensitivity. And who did they send? The same guy. I could not believe that through so many years, here was this same guy that kept showing up in my life, not just here but from around the world and of course, here he was again. His name..... Miguel.
I dont think that you can meet someone over and over again in the US and let alone around the world while all the time being within a few miles of each other without having it be "fate". I came to find out that he grew up most of his life in Hialeah which is about 20 minutes from where I lived most of my own life. We met three times in three different states and countries. And although things have not been perfect,.... he is the only one for me. Like Yin and Yang, we fit. We've been together 7 years now and it hasn't been better. I can complete his sentences for him, know what he's feeling most of the day, he'll call me while I was just thinking of him and when he flips his top, I can help to calm him down. He's rough around the edges and I'm calm and collect. He's mechanically inclined and good at math, I break everything and help him with his aweful spelling. lol
There is someone for everyone. He happened to be my someone that the powers that be wanted me to have. For better or worse, he is my soul mate. No matter if it lasts or not, fairy tale ending or utter disaster... he is my "someone". Period.
mp5racing21
Member
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- Sold:MP5, Saab 9-5
Actually the idea of a soulmate isn't too far from reality. Psychologically speaking, through the course of your life, subconciously you will be looking for your soulmate. A person will go through relationships, breakups, even divorces until finally they find their soulmate and settle down. Its kind of hard to argue with the soulmate theory, because in essence it says that your soulmate is your life partner. So basically the person you settle down with, be it a girlfriend or a wife, is your soulmate. I hope that makes sense a little bit.
I would say the reality is that a soul mate certainly doesn't exist. I idea is a super natural one so lets leave it out. Know what there surely is, is a psychological mate. And the good news is that there are THOUSANDS of them for everyone. The downside is that they may not be perfect physical speciman we wished they were, but none of us are either.
The problem is that far to many people are mentaly damaged when it comes to relationships and are unwilling to realize that even a great match takes work, fedality, and most importantly respect. So for these people there is no mate out there as no one will put up with there BS unless that person is themselves messed up. Ofcaorse we all know that matches made between these people are anything but fairy tale.
This is why its important to be a mentally well balanced person first, and then look for someone that will put up with you for the rest of your life.
The problem is that far to many people are mentaly damaged when it comes to relationships and are unwilling to realize that even a great match takes work, fedality, and most importantly respect. So for these people there is no mate out there as no one will put up with there BS unless that person is themselves messed up. Ofcaorse we all know that matches made between these people are anything but fairy tale.
This is why its important to be a mentally well balanced person first, and then look for someone that will put up with you for the rest of your life.
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thats just wrong
Its never ok to post up nude pics of someone you used to date on the internet. I dont care how much of an a**hole or b*tch they were. Thats just disrepectful and immature. I would never have dated someone like that after I saw that he did that to his ex.... no matter WHAT his excuse for doing it was. But pics of them photchopped onto Big Foot or something with horns coming out of their head isnt too bad. lol
And about finding that "someone". I dated more men in my life than I can even count. Its not to say that I slept with them all or even did anything remotely sexually with the majority of them. Most didnt even last more than 3 weeks with me. There were only 2 or 3 in my life that lasted longer than a year or more. But my family would always joke that the person that would be right for me, would be someone who could last more than 3 months. When they told me about that... I said "thats not true! You guys suck!" lol But sure enough, most on average would only be around for a few weeks or right at the three month mark, I'd break it off.
I never cheated on them, disrespected them in any way, nor intentionally hurt their feelings. They on the other hand is another story. At least two that I can remember cheated on me with nasty sl*tty younger girls that were dating lots of other men at the time (at least cheat on me with someone manogamous). A few others weren't the "tying" down type and weren't ready for a serious relationship. A few others were too immature, kissed my ass too much or were mentally a mess. The list goes on. For whatever reason, things just didnt work. At one time I thought to myself.... well geez.... I've dated half of the state... what's left? Isnt there ANYONE that I can get along with that isn't retarded? And sure enough, it took several years of heartbreak and fustration to find that one person that fit. He's no saint and he can be difficult at times, but there is still not and has not been anyone that just felt "right". And we have gone through some rough times and thought about leaving each other before, but we could never do it. Love is a powerful thing. It'll make you feel like a child sometimes and at others, make you lose your frekkin mind. lol
Its never ok to post up nude pics of someone you used to date on the internet. I dont care how much of an a**hole or b*tch they were. Thats just disrepectful and immature. I would never have dated someone like that after I saw that he did that to his ex.... no matter WHAT his excuse for doing it was. But pics of them photchopped onto Big Foot or something with horns coming out of their head isnt too bad. lol
And about finding that "someone". I dated more men in my life than I can even count. Its not to say that I slept with them all or even did anything remotely sexually with the majority of them. Most didnt even last more than 3 weeks with me. There were only 2 or 3 in my life that lasted longer than a year or more. But my family would always joke that the person that would be right for me, would be someone who could last more than 3 months. When they told me about that... I said "thats not true! You guys suck!" lol But sure enough, most on average would only be around for a few weeks or right at the three month mark, I'd break it off.
I never cheated on them, disrespected them in any way, nor intentionally hurt their feelings. They on the other hand is another story. At least two that I can remember cheated on me with nasty sl*tty younger girls that were dating lots of other men at the time (at least cheat on me with someone manogamous). A few others weren't the "tying" down type and weren't ready for a serious relationship. A few others were too immature, kissed my ass too much or were mentally a mess. The list goes on. For whatever reason, things just didnt work. At one time I thought to myself.... well geez.... I've dated half of the state... what's left? Isnt there ANYONE that I can get along with that isn't retarded? And sure enough, it took several years of heartbreak and fustration to find that one person that fit. He's no saint and he can be difficult at times, but there is still not and has not been anyone that just felt "right". And we have gone through some rough times and thought about leaving each other before, but we could never do it. Love is a powerful thing. It'll make you feel like a child sometimes and at others, make you lose your frekkin mind. lol
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i deleted all of my ex's nudes/half-nudes before we broke up.
my GF of over 4 years broke up with me a month or so ago (semi-mutual)... she thinks we can still be friends, but with me.. I either like you, or want to burn your house down. There's very few people that fall into my 'indifferent' category.
Sometimes I miss her, then I talk to her and make a stupid joke and she reacts the way she does and I remember why i don't miss her... and then i miss her again and the cycle repeats itself.
i suppose i'm a bit of a retard to not remember why we broke up.... it's kinda like KFC, ya? you don't eat it for years, but it smells really good - so every 2-3 years you have some and get sick cuz it sucks so much... and you remember not to touch it for another 2-3 years.
on the 'soulmate' issue... i have my own beliefs on souls 'n s***... but as far as finding someone with the proper combination of stupid quirks and sexual prowess that make you go tic-toc every day is quite possible.. there might be 4-5 people in the world that are 'perfect' for you.. not a 'soul' thing, but just a personality and physical combination that just matches your own setup just right.
my GF of over 4 years broke up with me a month or so ago (semi-mutual)... she thinks we can still be friends, but with me.. I either like you, or want to burn your house down. There's very few people that fall into my 'indifferent' category.
Sometimes I miss her, then I talk to her and make a stupid joke and she reacts the way she does and I remember why i don't miss her... and then i miss her again and the cycle repeats itself.
i suppose i'm a bit of a retard to not remember why we broke up.... it's kinda like KFC, ya? you don't eat it for years, but it smells really good - so every 2-3 years you have some and get sick cuz it sucks so much... and you remember not to touch it for another 2-3 years.
on the 'soulmate' issue... i have my own beliefs on souls 'n s***... but as far as finding someone with the proper combination of stupid quirks and sexual prowess that make you go tic-toc every day is quite possible.. there might be 4-5 people in the world that are 'perfect' for you.. not a 'soul' thing, but just a personality and physical combination that just matches your own setup just right.
siberiankiss
Member
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- blazing yellow MSP #1622
my boyfriend of over 3 years and i broke up about 6 months ago. every now and then it still gets to me, but it gets a little easier every day. and i'm sure everything will work out for the best. hang in there.. 
Lil Freek said:
Yeah, I've felt that way before too. I've always said that once an ex, ALWAYS an ex. I've tried to go back out with people I'd broke up with before and they NEVER work out. You break up and dont see or hear from them for a few months or a year or so, talk to them again, feel like there's something still there, go out once or twice and realize that you broke up with them for a reason. Attraction physically can only last so long. After that initial attraction fades and the mental fatigue and strain of the relationship sets in, THEN what?
Things get old, the butterflies float away, the same arguments get redundant... the only thing in the end that will keep it together for both your sakes is the willingness to change, mutual love and respect (and I dont mean you have to FEEL like you're head over heels in mushy love each and every day with that person) and the openess that you will always try to work matters out. If you've done everything you can and things STILL dont work out, at least you've tried your best. You win some, you lose some. But those weeks, months and years were not for nothing. It was a learning experience and you know what to do the next time you fall in love. It may not feel like you ever will again, and it will hurt for some time. But when it DOES happen, you'll be ready.
Time does heal all wounds. The only thing that helps that along is a friend, family and a brew. lol
haha. yeah... better years of my life were spent with the ex... it's all good, though.. i'm older, wiser... and i have a hot car and lots of money - both of which women enjoy 
I've spent the past 7 years of my life with 5 different women... there was only 6months where i was single, otherwise, just hopping from woman to woman - i gotta get out of that routine.
I'm enjoying the solitude of the single life and finally having an apartment all to myself. No more GF to complain that I'm spending too much on the car, too much time on my website or eating too boring of food (pb&j sandwiches are a normal dinner for me)
point is... being single again is just a new opportunity to relive life, for myself and for all the other singles in this thread... take advantage of it while you can.. no responsibilities for anybody else, or any consideration for someone else's feelings - i love it.. i'm a self-absorbed jerk now, and i know i can't live like that forever, so i live it while i can (boom06)
I've spent the past 7 years of my life with 5 different women... there was only 6months where i was single, otherwise, just hopping from woman to woman - i gotta get out of that routine.I'm enjoying the solitude of the single life and finally having an apartment all to myself. No more GF to complain that I'm spending too much on the car, too much time on my website or eating too boring of food (pb&j sandwiches are a normal dinner for me)
point is... being single again is just a new opportunity to relive life, for myself and for all the other singles in this thread... take advantage of it while you can.. no responsibilities for anybody else, or any consideration for someone else's feelings - i love it.. i'm a self-absorbed jerk now, and i know i can't live like that forever, so i live it while i can (boom06)
My brother was surfing on my husbands computer and found a pic that he will be forever traumatized over. lol
"I saw this really pretty girl in a teddy... and after I clicked on the thumb nail... I went ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!.... I may never be the same." - my brother
"I saw this really pretty girl in a teddy... and after I clicked on the thumb nail... I went ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!.... I may never be the same." - my brother
NeverSober
WTFPWN3D
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- 06 wrx
Yea we need to see the pic for ourselves..........hahaha just playin.........not really...........ok yea i am............but seriously wheres teh pic? haha
