anyone else have the "wife" blues?

Sometimes a good relationship is about striving for the same goal which should ultimately be putting your partner ahead of yourself and vice versa. If me getting a $200 mod for my car means things will be tight financially, then I won't get it. My wife would do the same. You always act in the best interest of the person you love. It doesn't matter if you make 100% of the income or 4%. The amount of money you bring in should not determine the power in a relationship IMHO.

It's not about being "controlled" it's about sacrifice and compromise. Just this evening my wife told me she was considering getting a second job because she knows that her working on her masters degree is putting a financial strain on us. She realizes that when she suffers, I suffer and vice versa. I respect her for that. I don't mind our income going towards her school books and fees because I know her getting a masters benefits us both eventually. She does not mind me spending $300 to upgrade my PC because she knows if I bring in $400 on a freelance design job, that cash helps us both.

I might say something is mine and she might say something is hers, but in the end, you gotta be in it together 100%. Fully committed. It's not to say that you lose your identity. My wife still supports and encourages all my nerdy habits (she wanted us to get rockband for a valentines day gift and comes out to Mazda meets with me). It's just that I put her needs first and she does the same for me. In the end, we both win.

Just my 2 cents. I will also venture to say "whacking the b**** with a shovel" is not a way to build a strong relationship. :)

What a buzz kill man.... clearly i was kidding... and clearly i give horrible advice.

Honest truth.... I couldn't agree more with you. Ultimately it is about team work and sacrifice for each other. But a couple of these posts make it sound like the wives are putting down the car or the poster's enjoyment of it. Or there is the "honey can i get a...?" followed by the resounding "NO!". You should not put down the things your significant other enjoys. It is degrading. You don't have to understand it, but putting it down is not right. (unless they are into something like doing lines of coke off the kitchen counter)
When money is tight that is one thing, but if its your money, and the bills are all paid, family is warm, clothed and well fed, (all family goals are taken care of) there shouldn't an issue in my book.

When im with someone, I don't expect them to give up their passions for me, nor me them.

As for the people complaining about their girlfriends bitching about money.... I say watch out. Its only gonna worse if you marry her. My ex used to b**** me out for not having a job while I spent every damn day searching for one. Said she hated 'paying for everything'. This was coming from a girl who was 23 and worked at subway for $8.00/hr for LESS than 20 hours a week. Then I got my current job, where I make more in a week then she makes in a month and a half. The hypocrisy was fantastic.... relationship ended shortly after.
 
I was just giving you a hard time man. Hence the smiley face. :)

But yeah, being constantly nagged is no fun either.

A man who finds a good woman is truly blessed. In the end, it's worth it!
 
I did miss the :)... sorry was witting at like 1 am after spending 5 hours passed out from work then waking up middle of the night.

And yes you are correct... the shovel method is not necessarily meant to "build" a strong relationship, per say :D.

PS Watch out for those sleepers... you know the the crazy ones who seem perfect, stable, and sane, and who rock your world for a short period of time, then once you let your guard down they go crazy and ruin your life.
 
You guys are being entirely too cordial to each other. Especially you, masshole. I expected better from your kind.
 
My wife is from Rhode Island. People up there are.......not so friendly. Except her family. They are wonderful.
 
.... Except her family. They are wonderful.

He said crying as she threatened him with a gun :D. Its ok, we understand. We all know how great in laws are. :)


Kain,
You know not everyone from MA talks like that I don't know why you would think that. What are you, ****** retahded or somethin? ....DOH!
 
We all know how great in laws are. :)

guarantee in like 8 hours, my gf's mom is going to be bitching at her telling her to break up with me. She's "not independent" because we're living together, and I'm helping her with her bills instead of her rents.. (they cut her off when the news broke that I was living with her)...
Yeah, inlaws are great. Her stepmom on the other hand... well lets just say I wish she had more influence!
 
ive never had a problem with any one the parents... they all like me, except the ex... but they decided not to knock...
 
ive never had a problem with any one the parents... they all like me, except the ex... but they decided not to knock...
yeah, I've had cousins, rents, sisters, brothers all call me after relationships have ended... these are the first that don't like me. And I'm the first guy her bro has liked... so.. I'll take what I can get. lol
 
he's definitely more important than mom. lives an hour and a half closer, and is her best friend. just sucks when mom-in-law hates your ass... lol. oh well.
 
dude, step-dad is a foot and ankle surgeon "big ass ring" means something TOTALLY different to her than it does to me... her mom's center stone is 3 carats, plus 1 carat side stones, and get this... TWO wedding bands, which weigh in at a carat each. She was wearing 6 carat diamond earrings at easter... take her to a pawn shop and I could buy a freckin house. I make 30K, its no small wonder why she doesn't like me.
 
did I mention that "step-dad" and mom aren't technically married? just been living together for like... 16 years. now go reread post #115. lol
 
dude, step-dad is a foot and ankle surgeon "big ass ring" means something TOTALLY different to her than it does to me... her mom's center stone is 3 carats, plus 1 carat side stones, and get this... TWO wedding bands, which weigh in at a carat each. She was wearing 6 carat diamond earrings at easter... take her to a pawn shop and I could buy a freckin house. I make 30K, its no small wonder why she doesn't like me.

WOW!!! but as long as chicky is happy its all good. I love the in-laws, her mom is a psycologist, but shes like one of those real earthy ppl, she doesnt take any meds, shes really into Native American type of liveing, but with a huge house and NICE ranch in CO, and her dad is a Lawyer... yeah I still woner how they got together...
 
did I mention that "step-dad" and mom aren't technically married? just been living together for like... 16 years. now go reread post #115. lol

COmmon Law marriage. I got a friend whos paarents are like that. and there the happiest couple Ive seen lol
 
yeah, I've basically been paying her bills for the last 6 months... and she's gotten a hard lesson in financial responsibility. She's doing well with it and though its caused fights, We're both better for it. More understanding of each other. The contrast here I failed to mention: My mother doesn't own a single diamond.
 
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